Kiwi Dash Review

Either I really am horrifically bad at endless runners, or I’m so used to the iPad now that transitioning over to the smaller touchscreen has had a negative effect on my skills. I first had the unfortunate dilemma that Kiwi Dash failed to even make it past the loading screen on my brand new iPad Air, so with disappointment, I had to reluctantly switch to the iPhone. I instantly regretted this decision.

Kiwi Dash is cute for the most part. It looks sharp, it’s remarkably accessible, and the amusing animated run of the flightless Kiwi (the bird, not the fruit) is enough to make anyone smile. However, I've never felt more like throwing my phone at a wall than when I played this poor defenseless game. It’s a great concept, and fun for someone who loves repetition, but for someone who can’t stand the idea of doing the same run over and over, it’s enough to make them tear their hair out.

In Kiwi Dash there are two simple touch controls: jump and dash. Holding jump will results in a higher jump, whereas tapping dash executes the ability to smash into obstacles and enemies. Unfortunately anything more than light hops will consume energy, and the less stamina one has the more likely the Kiwi bird doth die. Whilst this is all going on Kiwi has to collect fruit and aim to pick up energy refills, all of which are only slightly beneficial.

On the upside, the more kiwi fruits collected the more boosters and power-ups one is able to buy. On the downside, I've never discovered a more apt representation of "if you don't use it, you lose it." Likewise, “Kiwi Doubler” didn’t seem to make any difference when I used it (therefore I felt cheated out of 1500 kiwi fruits) and I failed to consume “Stamina Up” before dying tragically. Judging by the shop, if I spend a million hours on this game I may be able to afford to buy a new kiwi-bird that will give me a different set of unique attributes, but I still don’t think throwing away 40,000 kiwi fruits is worth the gamble. There’s also a gem store where I can pay horrific amounts of real money for gems to revive me when I die.

The daily and weekly challenges are somewhat intriguing for those with time on their hands, with un-lockable prizes for those keen to keep coming back. Alongside this there are a mixed bag of challenges to keep the game fresh; such as collecting 200 kiwi fruits or achieving a certain distance.

In all my sincerity, I honestly think that if I played Kiwi Dash on iPad I would have had different results. Forgive me for this review, but as soon as a fix is out for the iPad crashes there will definitely be amendments. Surprisingly, aside from all the above the game is strangely addictive.