Posts Tagged life
Ok, so we’re all about ready to accept that Kim Kardashian: Hollywood is a big deal on the App Store, regardless of your own personal feelings on the matter. However, did you know there are valuable life lessons to learn from it? And I don’t just mean that it’s a friendly reminder that stepping away from your iPhone is a very good idea sometimes, or that perhaps when you find yourself writing about such games for a living that you should consider a career change. No, I mean it teaches you valuable lessons that you can apply to real life scenarios. Honest.
Look how frowny-faced that guy looks. Isn’t he just so fed up? Some might say it’s thanks to those tight looking braces he’s wearing, obviously cutting into his shoulders a little too much. Fortunately, Kim Kardashian: Hollywood has some wise advice to offer. He needs to be charmed! Yup! Folks, you need to make room in your day to chat to people and remind them just how charming you really are. The more shallow the comment you make to them, the better. No one cares about depth in this world.
Fortunately, such charm can easily be applied either through some very expensive and hard to gain premium currency, or you can simply mention that you know Kim Kardashian. Because everyone’s impressed by her presence, right? Right? Don’t expect Mr Grumpypants to cheer up any time soon, though.
Journalists are leeches. WAIT. I don’t mean me, I’m nice! You know the kind I mean. Lon Garrera here demonstrates the problem. If it wasn’t for that media badge, he’d just be a random stalker with a camera, just waiting for a restraining order to strike him down.
It’s a long, long path to stardom. Just ask any celebrity, assuming they’re willing to speak to someone as lowly as you. While you could probably get cosy with the right celebrities to work your way up through the ranks, Kim Kardashian: Hollywood goes the classier route, expecting you to work your way up to stardom through grit and determination. Oh, and time. Lots and lots of time. And busywork.
If you try to talk to someone of the opposite sex in public, odds are someone’s going to think you’re an aspiring home wrecker. No, I don’t know why either, but Kim Kardashian: Hollywood seems pretty convinced of this fact. You need to come up with a date or two to seem less threatening. Always, always have a date spare, even if you’re perfectly happy single. The Kim Kardashian life is pretty archaic on that front.
Talent isn’t everything. Money, clothes, cars, and homes are all that really matters in terms of being successful and famous. Sad but true if this game is anything to go by. Feel free to weep in a corner.
Also, knowing the right people is everything. Absolutely everything. In real life, Kim Kardashian won’t give you the time of day, but let’s pretend that she would be this keen to help people get along. Otherwise fame is a much, much trickier path.
Kim Kardashian: Hollywood does offer one sensible piece of advice, though. Interested in someone and they’re interested in you? Go for it, regardless of if they’re the same gender as you, it doesn’t matter. It’s the 21st century, and while our century is increasingly dominated by the importance of materialism and being in the public eye at all times, we have at least made some progress in terms of acceptance.
Kim Kardashian: Hollywood is available now on the App Store and it’s a free download. I hear it’s sucking up people’s time. In my case, it’s merely broken my soul a bit.
EA Games has given us a great gift in preparation for the weekend: we have not one, but two great franchises on sale for $0.99. Both Boggle and Life have had their prices slashed to just under a dollar, while the Appvent Calender is featuring Crazy Snowboard, a 3D snowboarding game from eZone.
I looked at Life myself a few months ago, and it’s a great port of the classic board game. Almost every element makes the transition well, from the spinner to the colorful graphics to the fortunate and unfortunate events that happen to your poor character. Playing board games solo can be a lonely experience, but Life’s AI’s are competent and you can fast-forward through their turns; on the other hand, if you actually have a group of friends who want to play Life, EA’s Pass ‘n’ Play is here too. There are no corners cut when it comes to production values, and this is just one more great board game port in EA’s giant stable. Sure, it relies heavily on “traditional” family ideals (everyone gets married, everyone gets a house, unemployment blissfully lasts for a few seconds at most), but if you’re nostalgic for the old game, go for it while it’s cheap.
Released: 2009-08-13 :: Category: Games
Boggle is another great game, and one that word fans should love. When we looked at this September, it had all the bones of the great game but sadly it was missing some things:
I was interested to finally see Boggle launch on the App Store and more than ready to try it out. What I found was a good 1.0 game with an interesting approach but lacking a lot of the polish that the veteran apps have added along the way…There are some great features in the Advanced mode of this app, but the rest seems like it needs time and polish.
Take that recommendation with a grain of salt, however. Since we reviewed it, much-wanted updates have brought new features like Pass ‘n’ Play, and some bugs have been ironed out. Plus, hey, it’s Boggle. Any word fan can tell you that along with Scrabble, crosswords, and word finds, Boggle-style games are a nearly-ancient standby. You won’t find this game for cheaper—at least not an official version—so if you’ve been on the fence, this is the time to buy.
Released: 2009-08-31 :: Category: Games
And, finally, the Appvent Calender brings us Crazy Snowboard. Not Crazy Snowboarding, mind you, but Crazy Snowboard. What can be crazy about a simple board, I wonder?
Anyway, this looks like it follows the familiar track of snowboarding games. The graphics are great, and there’s a lot of content, too; thirty missions are included and you can unlock a number of boards and riders. You can grind on rails, boxes, logs, and candycanes, and it just looks like an awesome freebie for fans of such games. Future updates promise to add Plus+ support and leaderboards. For a sports game, this seems to have quite a bit of depth, and you can’t beat the price.