Porkos War Review
iPhone App
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Porkos War Review

Our Review by Chris Nitz on January 15th, 2011
Rating: starstarstarblankstarblankstar :: ABUSIVE
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Squashing enemies could be easier with nukes.

Developer: SouthLabs
Price: $1.99
Version: 1.0
App Reviewed on: iPad

Graphics / Sound Rating: starstarstarblankstarblankstar
User Interface Rating: starstarhalfstarblankstarblankstar
Gameplay Rating: starstarstarblankstarblankstar
Re-use / Replay Value Rating: starstarstarblankstarblankstar
Overall Rating: starstarstarblankstarblankstar

There is something terribly satisfying when you squish virtual bugs under you fingers. Porkos War takes that squishy goodness to a whole new frustrating level though. Those that have a need for squashing, and can tap as though they just injected straight caffeine into their systems should continue reading.

Porkos War brings the top-down castle defense style game into a fantasy world of invading peanut/potato type creatures. The enemy will flood down the screen in hopes of taking out your precious guard wall. It is up to you to tap on them to grind them into the dirt and end their mad rush. These little guys come prepared though. Suits of armor, shields, various mounts, and big bad creatures all require differing amounts of tapping to send them back into the hell from which they came. You are not without your own special defense though, as you control fireballs, rain, pools of oil, and lightning as weapons.

The first stage or two begin rather easy. You will be getting gold trophies easily here. Porkos War quickly turns into a test of frustration as enemies start coming in gigantic waves. If you cannot tap quickly, this game is going to beat you up like the bully waiting at the bike racks after school.

The game has a charming and humorous style about it. The Porkos die in pools of green blood. Each stage has a distinct settings ranging from lava pools to green pastures. Enemy units are varied and enjoyable. The audio is full of baddies yelling out commands to attack your wall, squishy death noises, and what can only be called farting noises as you attack the bigger folks. A deceptively light and humorous style hides the brutalality of the game well.

Where things fall apart is in the tapping mechanic itself. It feels as though your furious taps to survive do not all go registered. I know this as I watched the tap counter as I was tapping, and it would not always register my furious attacks. In a game based on how quickly you can get your fingers moving, this is a big downer. Granted it made me use a bit more strategy in my super powers to survive, but when I tap a peon at my wall 5 times to kill something that only needs one tap to die, it becomes an exercise in frustration.

Porkos War is entertaining enough to play in short bursts, but the control issue quickly makes you want to switch to a different game. If you don’t mind replaying a stage over and over, then this is all for you. Otherwise, hold out for an update or a price drop.


iPhone Screenshots

(click to enlarge)

PorkosWar screenshot 1 PorkosWar screenshot 2 PorkosWar screenshot 3 PorkosWar screenshot 4 PorkosWar screenshot 5
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